but I know, Dad, the ice is getting thin.

The date of my last entry would have been my father's 55th birthday. Forgot to add that in.

I have had so many dreams about he and Nana re-dying and me telling them I loved them and goodbye. I'm sure there's some deep-seated psychological reason from which the dreams stem, like guilt or regret, but I'm very tired of having them. It's nice to be able to say goodbye, even in a dream, but it puts a cloud over my day. Last night, my dream didn't involve Dad dying, nor did one from the other night, but they still made me incredibly melancholy and I wish I'd not had them.

Can I just move on? How horrible does that make me sound?